Episode 78

full
Published on:

31st May 2023

S4E2 - A Little Light Genocide

Join Laura and Xhafer, two internet strangers as they get to know each other while making jokes about one of their favorite TV shows from their childhood, Babylon 5.

Laura and Xhafer play plot poker while the writers are on strike. Meanwhile, the remaining crew on B5 continue to grapple with the apparent loss of Sheridan and Garibaldi in Babylon 5, Season 4 Episode 2: Whatever Happened to Mr. Garibaldi?

Transcript
Xhafer:

Hello and welcome to Who Are You?

Xhafer:

This is a Babylon five watch cast hosted by two former strangers now,

Xhafer:

friends who've gotten to know each other while we're watching A favorite

Xhafer:

show of the childhood, Babylon.

Xhafer:

Five.

Xhafer:

I'm Jafa

Laura:

And I'm Laura,

, Xhafer:

we're starting up season four here and we have our

, Xhafer:

first plot poker of the season.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

we can go ahead and open some packs and while we're opening

Xhafer:

some packs, we can talk a little bit about some stuff coming up.

Xhafer:

I we've got Ben Guesting on the pod in two weeks.

Xhafer:

Very excited for that.

Xhafer:

And we have been lining up.

Xhafer:

A handful of guests as well.

Xhafer:

Uh, f till the end of season four, we're gonna have somewhere between four

Xhafer:

to six guests on the pod right now.

Laura:

Which is just wild to me.

Laura:

I love it.

Xhafer:

It's crazy.

Xhafer:

I'm, I'm so here for it.

Xhafer:

I just, uh, I don't want to drop too many names.

Xhafer:

I know we're gonna have Gray 17 back.

Xhafer:

I know we're gonna have yum, yum back.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

But we're gonna have some other people in the league of not

Xhafer:

align podcasts, or not even necessarily babble on five podcasters, ideally.

Xhafer:

So we'll see how all of that goes, but,

Laura:

Branching out.

Laura:

I'm

Xhafer:

yeah, it's exciting.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

I got the death of Kosh and it's got his like ruined helmet on the table.

Laura:

Oh, yeah, I remember that scene.

Laura:

Yeah, that's a, that's a problem, right?

Xhafer:

That's gotta be a problem,

Laura:

You know, I was thinking about how uh, appropriate it is

Laura:

that we're doing plot poker today because at this point in time there's

Laura:

currently a writer's strike going on.

Laura:

So big deal.

Laura:

Right.

Laura:

Shows aren't getting written and won't be getting made pretty soon

Laura:

if this doesn't get resolved.

Laura:

And I was like, oh, it's good that we are making up our own plots and plot poker.

Laura:

So we can show people just how badly real writers are needed.

Xhafer:

Right.

Xhafer:

Like this is the kind of television, this would be everything

Xhafer:

if it weren't for writers.

Xhafer:

Big support to the writers.

Xhafer:

Ooh, I got Lieutenant David Corwin.

Laura:

Oh, nice.

Laura:

I think I have a Corman in there somewhere.

Xhafer:

Ooh, I got atheris I haven't seen before.

Xhafer:

Z a

Laura:

Another athe.

Laura:

Do did, we talked about this last time.

Laura:

Do you have a atheros in every pile?

Xhafer:

I do not have a Zs in any pile right now.

Xhafer:

I don't think I mu I must have 'em in one.

Laura:

that's, I know we've used Atheros as a character, but I feel like Atheros

Laura:

can also be a problem, solution, or twist.

Laura:

So,

Xhafer:

A hundred percent.

Xhafer:

Did you see the uh, thing that uh, Claudia Christensen tweeted the cast of the

Xhafer:

Babylon five reboot and everyone was Zs?

Laura:

That's appropriate.

Laura:

I don't feel like I'm getting great cards this time.

Laura:

I have a um, minister Deran, who I did not recognize by name, but

Laura:

it says he's a Centara spy master.

Xhafer:

Ooh.

Laura:

I don't remember him specifically, but I bet he'll come up this season.

Xhafer:

More than likely I got a uh, cheat fate with Lian from this episode.

Xhafer:

It's even got the quote, you are quite, quite dead.

Laura:

Oh, nice.

Xhafer:

And another Atheros I haven't seen before.

Laura:

You're gonna have the full set, man.

Laura:

How many different actresses did we say there were?

Laura:

I can't remember.

Xhafer:

I think there's one with an apostrophe in every place, but they're

Xhafer:

kind of spread out throughout various sets, so we won't see all of them unless

Xhafer:

we want to spend some stupid money on one of those really expensive boxes.

Xhafer:

Cuz I

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

the next couple of boxes lined up for us are pricey.

Xhafer:

I know, I think the season five box, the wheel of fire box is something

Xhafer:

like $200 and it's just like, mm, maybe

Laura:

We should put a GoFundMe out there.

Laura:

Everybody fund our box of cards.

Laura:

Man.

Laura:

I don't feel like I got very many interesting cards at all.

Laura:

I got a lot of the vague sort of situation cards

Xhafer:

So we'll go ahead and start with our A plot.

Xhafer:

Uh, If you have not heard this bit before, we have four piles of

Xhafer:

cards built out of the Babylon five collectible card game in front of us.

Xhafer:

We have a.

Xhafer:

Instigating character or visitor to the station.

Xhafer:

We have a problem, we have a solution, and we have a twist.

Xhafer:

And so what's gonna happen is this time Laura's gonna do the alo.

Xhafer:

I'm outta her four cards.

Xhafer:

I'm gonna do the B plot out of my four cards, and then we're going to rate this

Xhafer:

episode on a scale of Babylon one to five.

Xhafer:

Like we had just watched it.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

And we're flipping these things over as we're going, so uh,

Xhafer:

no idea.

Xhafer:

I got four cards sitting in front of me.

Xhafer:

I know which one is which.

Xhafer:

Cuz I put them in order, but I don't know what they actually are.

Laura:

right.

Laura:

And quality is not guaranteed on

Xhafer:

No, we've had some stinkers.

Laura:

Yeah, definitely support your local writers on their strike

Laura:

because you do not want us doing this.

Xhafer:

A hundred percent.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

So here goes a plot.

Laura:

Oh, hey, my, a plot character is John Sheridan,

Xhafer:

Oh hey.

Laura:

so hey, we get the uh, the big guns right out of the gate.

Laura:

Maybe this will be a good episode.

Laura:

And the problem that John Sheridan is dealing with, oh, this is a classic.

Laura:

He's got a hate crime on the station.

Xhafer:

Ah.

Laura:

So yeah, we've definitely heard this uh, problem before.

Laura:

The card is of course, the Mbar character from season one that was attacked.

Laura:

But so the solution to this uhoh is we're gonna solve this hate crime that happened

Laura:

on Babylon five with some backroom dealing

Xhafer:

Oh,

Laura:

Oh, so.

Xhafer:

an unusual way to handle a hate crime

Laura:

It is an unusual way to handle a

Xhafer:

normally, I'm not particularly fond of this when

Xhafer:

this happens in real life.

Laura:

right, but you know what, it is consistent a little bit

Laura:

with what we've seen from some of Sheridan's character, right?

Laura:

Because we had some very questionable actions when he was questioning Mr.

Laura:

Morden the lack of due process and all.

Laura:

So we've got this, this hate crime.

Laura:

I don't know.

Laura:

What race do you think the hate crime is committed against?

Xhafer:

Oh, maybe we'll find out in the B plot.

Laura:

oh, yeah, good point.

Laura:

I won't, I won't speculate.

Laura:

Maybe your B plot's gonna inform me.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

And then uh, here we go.

Laura:

This is great.

Laura:

The twist is that John Sheridan feels kind of bad about these backroom dealings

Laura:

that we use to solve this hate crime.

Laura:

And so he goes on walk about.

Laura:

He's gonna go find himself because he doesn't know who he is anymore.

Xhafer:

Oh, good.

Xhafer:

Holler at yum.

Xhafer:

Yum.

Xhafer:

They want, they want the news.

Laura:

they'll love this.

Laura:

We should mail him this card,

Xhafer:

You should.

Laura:

except it'd be like atrociously expensive to mail to Australia.

Laura:

One

Xhafer:

probably just throw it in an envelope with like six stamps.

Xhafer:

You'll probably get there.

Laura:

Yeah, sure.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

Tell me the B plot.

Xhafer:

Our B plot has Justin, the other shadow leader dude

Laura:

Oh yeah.

Laura:

Who got blowed up?

Xhafer:

He got blowed up, this is before that, but he comes to the station Oh, to

Xhafer:

have a meeting with William Morgan Clark.

Laura:

Whoa, Big deals.

Xhafer:

deal.

Xhafer:

This is this is not President Clark.

Xhafer:

This is Vice President Clark.

Laura:

Okay.

Xhafer:

So this would be, I guess in season one.

Xhafer:

Justin shows up and has a meeting with Clark.

Xhafer:

Maybe Clark's coming to the station and we see Justin kind of come in.

Laura:

Oh yeah.

Laura:

You know, this is really bad time for there to be a hate crime.

Xhafer:

yes.

Xhafer:

So This timing has lost all semblance.

Xhafer:

Because our solution is Lida empowered,

Laura:

Oh, hmm.

Xhafer:

which is Lida, post Volans stuff is also here.

Xhafer:

And make sure that uh, I'm guessing Justin's trying to maybe pull some shit,

Xhafer:

maybe try and get some access to the vice president that he's not supposed to have.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Maybe he caused the hate crime

Xhafer:

maybe he caused the hate crime.

Xhafer:

Maybe.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Maybe it's Clark's visit spurned the hate crime and it's uh, I

Xhafer:

don't think we see hate crimes against humans at all in the show.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

No, I

Xhafer:

bit maybe, but not really particularly common.

Xhafer:

Maybe it's something along those lines.

Laura:

Uhhuh.

Xhafer:

Um, or maybe, you know, since he's such a xenophobe, it's

Xhafer:

probably more likely that some of his support supporters like

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Maybe it's Humans did the hate

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Humans did the hate crime.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

That checks

Laura:

That's why we need backroom dealings to, yeah.

Laura:

Okay.

Xhafer:

on the station, but Alito stops Justin's associates from getting to Clark.

Xhafer:

And then our twist is, this is perfect.

Xhafer:

What do you want?

Xhafer:

So they stop Justin from getting to Clark, but Morden does

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

thus setting off the chain of events we know to happen.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

He asked the fateful question, and we know what Clark wants.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

That's like the end to, that's like the, the credits theme is Mr.

Xhafer:

Morden, like the door opens, Clark's there, Morden walks in and

Xhafer:

he's all like, what do you want

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

to, credits like, perfect.

Laura:

And scene.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Hmm.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

Well, how do you rate this episode of Babylon?

Laura:

Five?

Xhafer:

would watch the shit out of this episode.

Laura:

Yeah, this does sound like a good one, right?

Laura:

This is a winner.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Sorry, writers.

Xhafer:

Looks like you're replaceable.

Laura:

Yep,

Xhafer:

Some We get chat, g p t to run, put a script together.

Xhafer:

I'm kidding.

Xhafer:

Writers, I support Strike wholeheartedly.

Xhafer:

Just in case.

Xhafer:

This is the first time you're listening to me and you don't know

Xhafer:

how I feel about this stuff, which is mind blowing to me that this would

Xhafer:

you just pick an episode and start?

Xhafer:

But yeah, I, I know people listen to podcasts like that.

Xhafer:

No.

Xhafer:

Obviously writers, we greatly support you in your strike.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

This might be a stellar episode, but I feel like we've had

Laura:

some real deads on this, so

Xhafer:

sure.

Xhafer:

This is, this is a good one though.

Xhafer:

I'm gonna, I'm gonna go ahead and put this at four out of five,

Laura:

Yeah, I think

Xhafer:

got a professional writing team behind it, it might be a five.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Solid.

Laura:

We, we can give 'em the bones and they can put all the meat on

Xhafer:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

That's what you need.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

We're clearly producers.

Laura:

Right.

Xhafer:

Yep.

Laura:

Well, speaking of good episodes, we have an episode ahead

Laura:

of us to talk about and we can decide whether Root's good or not.

Xhafer:

Do you not.

Xhafer:

like this episode?

Xhafer:

Wait, we, we gotta save that for the end, but your statement leads me to believe

Xhafer:

you might not be a fan of this episode.

Laura:

I, I don't, not gonna spoil anything for the end.

Laura:

Let's just uh,

Xhafer:

Get into it.

Laura:

get into it.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

We kind of get some more of that like last time on stuff, but this time is from Dr.

Laura:

Franklin.

Xhafer:

Who is actually in this episode

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Actually we get a lot of people in this episode that we didn't get

Laura:

much of in the previous episode,

Xhafer:

on purpose,

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

It feels like we gotta go back and get some of the gang that we left out.

Xhafer:

Yep.

Xhafer:

Yep.

Xhafer:

We got season four, episode two.

Xhafer:

Whatever happened to Mr.

Xhafer:

Garibaldi?

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

we open on Franklin's recap with a gaff.

Xhafer:

He say Sheridan's been missing for 14 days and Garibaldis been gone for nine.

Xhafer:

They went missing the same day.

Laura:

yeah.

Laura:

That's what it seemed like.

Xhafer:

It is j m s

Laura:

It's gotta

Xhafer:

on Usenet.

Xhafer:

Someone's all like, Hey, this thing like that doesn't feel right.

Xhafer:

He's like, it's not.

Xhafer:

I went back and changed the date after I changed the script, but I

Xhafer:

only changed it once and not twice.

Xhafer:

Sorry.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

He forgot the old uh, control F.

Xhafer:

Such I'll happen.

Laura:

Yep.

Xhafer:

Lanier tells Franklin there's a problem with Dalen while Sheridan guests

Xhafer:

on our podcast, but instead of hosted by us, it is two of those p string dolls

Xhafer:

of us that they used to make us toys in the eighties, where they only have

Xhafer:

like one saying, you know, there's like,

Xhafer:

what do you want?

Xhafer:

What do you want?

Xhafer:

Who are you?

Xhafer:

Who are you?

Xhafer:

Are you, what do you want?

Xhafer:

What do you want?

Xhafer:

It's those I don't know if you knew that that was in our merch store.

Xhafer:

That totally exists.

Xhafer:

Uh, but you can get those dolls on our merch store, so you

Xhafer:

should totally go check that out.

Laura:

definitely.

Xhafer:

The, they're outta sale.

Xhafer:

They, they've actually been outta stock since the eighties, so

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Yeah, that's too bad.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Laura:

1999 was the original cost.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Sheridan wakes up from the nightmare of being interviewed by us,

Xhafer:

uh, just totally geeking out at him to Lorian being that super

Xhafer:

stoned guy at the college party two weeks into Philosophy 1 0 1.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

Like We get it, dude, the brain is a fucking marvel.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

So we get that to theme and then uh, Sheridan is just incredulous when we

Laura:

come back from theme that he could be dead even though he remembers falling

Laura:

and falling for a very long time.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Lian says that there is never a good answer to who are you, and I am personally

Xhafer:

wounded because I feel like we've had some really great cold opens on this podcast.

Laura:

It's funny you say that cuz I was like, yeah, there really isn't, is there?

Laura:

Can confirm.

Laura:

So I don't know.

Laura:

I guess That shows something else about each of us, doesn't it?

Xhafer:

We get a one of two variations.

Xhafer:

We'll see on the, the big questions here.

Xhafer:

What are you

Xhafer:

and Lian?

Xhafer:

That's rude.

Xhafer:

This isn't Florida.

Xhafer:

You could just can't ask someone that.

Xhafer:

And for fuck's sake, if you do, don't ask them like that.

Xhafer:

Ask them what their pronouns are.

Xhafer:

It's not that fucking hard.

Xhafer:

Be polite.

Xhafer:

Ugh, Lori, and tell Sheridan.

Xhafer:

His pronouns are now past tense as he

Xhafer:

checks for a pulse and doesn't have one.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Bummer.

Laura:

Bummer.

Xhafer:

so.

Xhafer:

This conversation continues.

Xhafer:

Lian kind of reminds me of a friend I have here.

Laura:

Oh, yeah.

Xhafer:

I have a friend who firmly believes this is like, this is,

Xhafer:

this is his view of the universe.

Xhafer:

Everything is 50 50.

Xhafer:

Doesn't matter what it is.

Xhafer:

Either it is or it isn't.

Xhafer:

It will or it won't.

Xhafer:

Everything is always 50 50

Laura:

There's no gray for him.

Xhafer:

life.

Xhafer:

Or rather it's all gray until it isn't.

Xhafer:

I think

Laura:

Oh, okay.

Laura:

All right.

Xhafer:

I don't know.

Xhafer:

It's like you'd ask him the weather and he'd be like, oh,

Xhafer:

like, cause you're camping, right?

Xhafer:

And he'd be like, oh, it'll rain or it won't, it's like,

Xhafer:

not what I was asking buddy.

Xhafer:

There's actually science, but.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Well, at least you know, at least your friend reminds you of this

Laura:

Wayne Alexander character and not, I was gonna say Morty again.

Laura:

What is his name?

Laura:

Jack the Ripper

Laura:

in Hereness

Xhafer:

ripper

Xhafer:

Man, I, I have to admit, like I am, I'm a pretty active pacifist.

Xhafer:

Like when it comes to real life shit uh,

Xhafer:

violence is, is not an answer.

Xhafer:

Violence is a multiplier of suffering.

Laura:

sure.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

And while violence has solved problems in the very broadest sense, it

Xhafer:

has always caused more problems in turn.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

Uh, so I can't say that I fully understand Sheridan's reaction

Xhafer:

when he throws Larry in against the wall, but I felt it, man,

Xhafer:

like he is real fucking annoying.

Laura:

Yeah, yeah.

Xhafer:

Like the thought had crossed my mind.

Xhafer:

And

Laura:

Well, if a dead man pushes you against a wall, does it hurt?

Xhafer:

probably, I.

Xhafer:

Kar arrives on Nimbus three and, uh, meets with a role that would surely be

Xhafer:

played by Pete Davidson in the reboot.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

This, This is

Laura:

This guy's nasty

Xhafer:

who is a thug in like 50 movies.

Laura:

Uhhuh.

Xhafer:

just like what he does but the guy who comes up and starts the fight.

Xhafer:

Did his voice sound familiar to you at all?

Laura:

He seemed familiar.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Why?

Laura:

Why does he seem familiar to

Xhafer:

This is Anthony DeLong and his IMDB page is Rivaled

Xhafer:

only by his CVS receipt.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

What's it?

Laura:

Gimme some highlights.

Xhafer:

Well, hey, I'll start off with v.

Xhafer:

What up Scott Gray?

Xhafer:

17.

Xhafer:

We gotta get that rolling.

Xhafer:

Uh, he's in Roadhouse.

Xhafer:

He's a Cason and Voyager.

Xhafer:

He's the voice of Marshall Johnson in the Red Dead Games.

Xhafer:

He's still working, he's still actively doing voice acting and physical acting.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

is everywhere.

Xhafer:

He has something like 150 credits and most of them are as a stunt man too.

Xhafer:

Like he has a bunch of acting credits and then he has a bunch of stunt man credits.

Xhafer:

So he is made that transition,

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Okay.

Xhafer:

even writer director.

Laura:

Yeah,

Xhafer:

Anyways, Marcus heard there was gonna be a bar fight, so he shows up as

Xhafer:

we find Dalen has left everyone on Red

Laura:

I like that.

Laura:

Marcus shows up here because, you know, we had girls trip in the last

Laura:

episode and now we've got Boys Trip.

Xhafer:

Trip.

Laura:

They kind of didn't, they didn't trip together.

Laura:

They met up at On Locale, but we're doing the thing.

Xhafer:

I get it.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

but yeah uh, Thelen is just ignoring everyone.

Xhafer:

Franklin goes to check up on her.

Xhafer:

True reminder her that she's part human and needs to fucking eat.

Laura:

Yeah,

Laura:

very good point.

Xhafer:

I had written like four more jokes here.

Xhafer:

But Miro just acts the hell out of this scene,

Laura:

She

Xhafer:

so I'm just gonna go ahead and say no notes.

Xhafer:

Because she fucking pulled up my heartstrings.

Xhafer:

I'm like, sitting here.

Xhafer:

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Xhafer:

Joke, joke, joke.

Xhafer:

And then it's like, oh no, this is, she's, she's too good at this scene.

Xhafer:

I can't fucking make jokes.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

I think I did have some little tears here that, that phrase, when, where

Laura:

no shadows fall really gets me,

Xhafer:

yeah,

Laura:

me every time.

Xhafer:

yeah.

Xhafer:

Just wait till the end of season five.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

So essentially she tells Franklin, no dice, I'm gonna continue my fast.

Laura:

I'm gonna continue morning.

Laura:

So,

Laura:

Back on the planet, Marcus and Kar trying to figure out, What to do now.

Xhafer:

Yeah, they're worried that the thugs are still looking for them.

Xhafer:

Like it was just a little bar fight they should have given up by now.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

It's weird.

Laura:

It's weird.

Xhafer:

yeah.

Xhafer:

I do love their exchange here.

Xhafer:

Marcus telling Shakar I assumed because you went looking for someone in trouble

Xhafer:

that you yourself would find trouble.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

Great stuff.

Laura:

Accurate.

Laura:

Marcus is very smart.

Xhafer:

Marcus tries to warn Ja car about his staff

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Our thugs get an ID on Citizen Ja car from Simpson, Tori Guards while

Xhafer:

Marcus Interrogates, Pete Davidson, and

Laura:

I love that the Centara apparently used hexagonal paper.

Xhafer:

Like Battlestar Galactica, the next show we'll be watching on this

Laura:

Oh, right, right.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

So that that gets carried over.

Xhafer:

Yeah, we found the link.

Xhafer:

They're same universe, it's Cannon

Laura:

Oh, obviously, yeah.

Xhafer:

Franklin is going through Sheridan's room when

Xhafer:

he calls to show her something.

Xhafer:

He found uh, he's got a log entry from May the previous year.

Xhafer:

This is about a month or so after our three parter in the first half.

Laura:

Okay.

Xhafer:

Uh, because they tell us that's April and then we, he says the date

Xhafer:

is May at the start of the log entry.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

Gotcha.

Xhafer:

we actually don't have any episodes set in May from last season.

Xhafer:

It jumps from

Laura:

Hmm.

Xhafer:

to June.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

That's because Sheridan was busy falling in

Laura:

love.

Xhafer:

other nerds figured that out for me.

Xhafer:

So I just thank you Babylon.

Xhafer:

Five wiki people.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

So uh, He talks a bit about jumping off of a cliff here.

Xhafer:

This is pretty poor taste, Franklin.

Laura:

Well, Dalin doesn't know that he jumped.

Laura:

Right.

Laura:

She just knows he went to Zha do and didn't come back.

Laura:

Oh, wait.

Laura:

Or did, did Veer tell her that he jumped

Xhafer:

I don't think

Xhafer:

Veer knew, I think.

Laura:

veer knew that the white star crashed

Xhafer:

Oh no, he was last seen jumping into the cavern.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

She told, he knows.

Xhafer:

Rude.

Laura:

Oh man.

Laura:

Sheridan's one of those people foreshadowing his own death.

Laura:

Cool.

Xhafer:

I got a question for you.

Xhafer:

Here

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

is the implication that Franklin found this.

Xhafer:

I'm gonna, do you wanna call 'em Dvcs or you want to call 'em like calcite rays?

Xhafer:

The, the videos that are stored on crystals a

Laura:

Oh, I like Dvcs.

Xhafer:

dvc uh, You think he like found this with this on it?

Xhafer:

Or is Franklin like going through all of his personal logs?

Laura:

Yeah, that's a good question.

Xhafer:

Also, is Franklin not clearing the browser history

Xhafer:

by showing something like this?

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

You've gotta clear the browser history.

Laura:

Be a bro.

Xhafer:

me be clear.

Xhafer:

Clear my browser history, like no one needs that.

Xhafer:

The kind of life I've had, like my two truths and a lie are I've been threatened

Xhafer:

to be sued by the Special Olympics.

Xhafer:

I have almost sued the TV show Supernatural, and I was sent to cease

Xhafer:

and desist by Doctors Without Borders.

Xhafer:

What I search is between me, Google and everyone, they sell that shit to, not you.

Laura:

Right.

Xhafer:

Ugh.

Xhafer:

It's so upsetting to think about someone just going through your

Xhafer:

shit like that and like having, like having done this for, you know, people

Xhafer:

that have passed and having to go

Xhafer:

through their things.

Xhafer:

Like, I can't imagine finding a diary, sitting down, reading

Xhafer:

it while going through all

Xhafer:

of their stuff and then calling their girlfriend in morning to be

Xhafer:

all like, oh, hey, here's this really

Laura:

come look at this.

Xhafer:

entry about you.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

did he stop when he, she, he started to talk about falling in love.

Xhafer:

Did he listen to the whole thing and then call her like, I mean, we

Xhafer:

know

Laura:

choices here,

Xhafer:

a history with some questionable choices in how much research he's

Xhafer:

willing to do, so I would think that he would just do the bare minimum because

Xhafer:

that's how he always does his research when it's about something like this.

Xhafer:

But maybe not, I don't know.

Xhafer:

It's just.

Xhafer:

It felt skeezy to me.

Laura:

I could see in the instance like of this sort of

Laura:

disappearance that Sheridan has.

Laura:

You know, he kind of goes rogue and, and disappears and dies and whatever.

Laura:

Maybe you need to to read the last few pages of the diary.

Laura:

You know,

Laura:

just like try to figure it out, put some pieces together.

Laura:

But he went back to May.

Xhafer:

Yeah, yeah.

Xhafer:

This was

Laura:

I don't think he needed to go in the bag that

Xhafer:

I mean, maybe it was the previous entry, maybe he just went and

Xhafer:

looked at the most recent private log and that's the last time he did one.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

That, that seems weird though, right?

Laura:

Like our captains are supposed to be logging a little bit more often,

Xhafer:

mean, maybe it's just Star Trek Spoils Us has a plot device.

Xhafer:

I

Laura:

true.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Could be

Xhafer:

meanwhile, Kar and Marcus decide to Scooby-Doo and split

Xhafer:

up with Marcus heading back to Babylon five and Kar getting got.

Laura:

This is the rookie mistake.

Laura:

You never split the party.

Laura:

Don't split the party.

Xhafer:

split the party.

Xhafer:

Marcus would've taken out like four of those cent Tori dudes would

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

problem.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

He would've heard him coming.

Laura:

We know our Marcus.

Xhafer:

Although, I guess that would have long term implications for the story.

Xhafer:

Each car not getting caught.

Xhafer:

that's not a conversation we're having right now.

Laura:

No, no, no, no.

Laura:

We'll get there very soon.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

But yeah, Jaar gets himself caught by the Centara.

Laura:

He puts up a little firefight

Xhafer:

he he shoots like one dude.

Laura:

Yeah, he tries.

Xhafer:

Given he like totally knew they were about to jump him.

Xhafer:

You'd figure he could get more than one cuz he's like awake

Xhafer:

and listening and I don't

Xhafer:

know, it felt very un ja car tomy.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

The, they should have written a few more, but maybe we didn't

Laura:

have the extras to like mow down.

Xhafer:

Fair enough.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

If there aren't four dudes, you're not taking Ja car in, so you can only

Xhafer:

kill one cuz you've got five extras.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

Right.

Xhafer:

fair.

Xhafer:

I would rather that than him fight five dudes, kill four of them, and then get

Xhafer:

taken in by one that seems less heroic.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

back on Babylon five len's uh, viewing of the diary has given her a little change

Laura:

of heart, and she's decided that she needs to gather the whole white star fleet

Laura:

and try to mount a full scale attack on Zha Doom.

Laura:

You know, with, they still have a few members of the League

Laura:

of Non-Line worlds, I think,

Xhafer:

Yeah, they're, they're calling a couple allies, but the

Xhafer:

league itself is kind of kaput.

Laura:

Yeah, yeah,

Xhafer:

She's just like, Hey, we're going on a suicide admission for my boyfriend.

Xhafer:

I mean, attacking Z Zaha.

Laura:

yeah, yeah.

Xhafer:

Totally no ulterior motives here.

Laura:

Right?

Xhafer:

Meanwhile, on Sonari Prime, Lando gets woken up so he

Xhafer:

can spit sick shit at Royal Court,

Xhafer:

When Canark gives Lando a gift, Kar

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

What he's always wanted, apparently,

Xhafer:

Kar gets a moment to speak here and he decides the most

Xhafer:

important thing is to let Lando know that Garabaldi is missing

Laura:

I think this is a good choice

Laura:

though, because Lando definitely had a bond with Mr.

Laura:

Garibaldi.

Laura:

Even if it kind of got broken by his, you know, genocide.

Xhafer:

You don't have to whisper it.

Laura:

It's just awkward, you know, when you, when you do a little light genocide.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

So embarrassing.

Laura:

So embarrassing.

Laura:

But we know that Lando still has a connection and feelings for Mr.

Laura:

Garibaldi and that, that sounded very awkward and romantic,

Laura:

but you know what I mean?

Xhafer:

I, I have not looked at archive of our own, but I assume that that is

Xhafer:

the place for that particular thing.

Xhafer:

Uh,

Laura:

For that particular

Xhafer:

right.

Xhafer:

You I'm sure there's plenty.

Xhafer:

Um,

Laura:

Yeah, so Jaar knows he's gonna care, and I'm glad

Laura:

that that's what he decided to

Xhafer:

agreed.

Xhafer:

This is super smart play by JA Car.

Xhafer:

then we cut to the aforementioned Mr.

Xhafer:

Garabaldi in all 20 seconds we see him in, in the episode that bears his name.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

He's not in great shape.

Laura:

He's like in a hexagonal room.

Xhafer:

It is a very non-descript cell,

Laura:

Hmm hmm.

Xhafer:

and his captor is not forthcoming with information, but uh, when he

Xhafer:

turns to violence, they gas him.

Xhafer:

And,

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

They're just like taunting him over speaker.

Xhafer:

did you connect the dots on who this was at this point?

Xhafer:

Like I, you probably remember from watching the show previous?

Laura:

Yeah, I, are you saying I'm supposed to get

Laura:

something from the voice itself

Xhafer:

No, the voice is different.

Xhafer:

It's the, the man entering the room.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

Tell me about the man entering the room.

Laura:

Like I know, I know from having watched the show,

Xhafer:

Okay.

Xhafer:

We're not supposed to know at this point,

Xhafer:

but knowing and seeing, it's pretty obvious to me.

Xhafer:

And looking at old Usenet posts, a ton of people clocked this,

Laura:

Okay.

Xhafer:

And jms was like adamant about not saying anything.

Xhafer:

So I will not say anything as well as it's not confirmed that it's

Xhafer:

who you know it is at this point.

Laura:

Are we supposed to know it's a specific person?

Xhafer:

I mean, there's a very clear uniform that is

Xhafer:

missing one clear insignia.

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

and there's also a height build and hair that match

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

Okay.

Laura:

Gotcha.

Xhafer:

Anyways Lando goes to visit Kar also in captivity.

Xhafer:

We get see Lando and or we see Kar and Aldine captivity back to back.

Xhafer:

Lando tells Kar what is in store from him.

Xhafer:

This is clearly like I've seen this happen, not a this is what

Xhafer:

you have to look forward to.

Xhafer:

Like I don't wish this upon my worst enemy, which is literally you by the way.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

Like,

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

This is a this description.

Laura:

If we were seeing this show as it is in this era that we are now in of

Laura:

prestige television, like we would've gotten a scene already where Car Taja

Laura:

is doing this to somebody, right?

Laura:

Like, Kind of like our Ramsey Boltons in Game of Thrones, like the, the

Laura:

despicable things that some of our bad characters in that series did.

Laura:

We, we saw it.

Laura:

We definitely would've gotten this with the Carta.

Laura:

It would not just be Alando monologue here in the jail.

Xhafer:

Although it is one of those things that I feel like is a bit lost

Xhafer:

on television these days where it is scarier sometimes to tell and not show.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

So let let your brain put the image together and it will be scarier

Xhafer:

than anything that they could anyways.

Xhafer:

Lando brings Kar in on the plot to kill car taja.

Xhafer:

And Kar agrees to help for the future of the Narn.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Kar is not going to go along with this unless he gets

Laura:

something out of it for Narn.

Laura:

And, uh, Mondo tries to say, well, you can't bargain.

Laura:

You're in jail.

Laura:

And Ja car's like, well, you can't bargain either cuz you're trying

Laura:

to assassinate your emperor.

Laura:

Like

Xhafer:

And gotcha.

Xhafer:

Bitch

Laura:

yeah.

Laura:

They both have each other up against a wall.

Xhafer:

Sheridan has walked in a giant circle making it back to his campfire.

Xhafer:

Lian takes the physical opportunity to reference the metaphysical and brings

Xhafer:

the conversation back where it started.

Xhafer:

And then Lian reveals that he is.

Xhafer:

Not a first one, but the first one,

Laura:

So is Lori and God, he's basically God,

Xhafer:

this is something posed to jms actually was asked directly this question

Laura:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

and he's like, he is a God no more than any other person who is alive.

Xhafer:

Is just like, no, he's just the first dude.

Xhafer:

He's just like the first being that it, the first sentient like

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

not a God.

Laura:

I mean, how do you define God, I suppose, but yeah.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

I mean, if it's immortal and you know, like there's, there's

Xhafer:

definitely definitions from various cultures that would fit,

Laura:

yeah.

Xhafer:

uh, but not the omnipresent creator kinda monotheistic vibe.

Xhafer:

Probably not.

Xhafer:

Lori's been waiting for someone to talk to and reveals that the shadows

Xhafer:

come to Zha for him to show respect.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

A weird way to show respect, I suppose.

Xhafer:

Lorian sees Kosh and Sheridan.

Xhafer:

And Sheridan puts together that Kosh was directing him to Lorian.

Xhafer:

Lorian tells him to embrace life, not just flee from death.

Xhafer:

And we get another question in between our two here.

Xhafer:

Why are you,

Xhafer:

which was

Laura:

And didn't uh, didn't Emperor Urian ask that as well?

Laura:

Why are you

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Why are you here?

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Laura:

That's a third very important question.

Xhafer:

Lori's like, dude, you need to go to therapy.

Xhafer:

And Sheridan's like, no,

Laura:

Men would rather die than go to therapy.

Laura:

Men would rather jump in a bottomless chasm on zha doom than go to therapy.

Xhafer:

men would rather literally nuke their ex-wife than go to therapy.

Xhafer:

Sheridan does think of a reason to live though Dalen

Xhafer:

and the Lorian breathes on the embers of life to credits.

Xhafer:

All right, Laura, what'd you think of this one?

Laura:

Oh gosh, what we had uh, the last episode is just kind of average, right?

Laura:

We called it number three.

Laura:

Hmm.

Xhafer:

I can't check cuz it's actually in my old notebook.

Xhafer:

I've, I moved on to a new notebook.

Xhafer:

I managed to fill an entire notebook with notes

Laura:

Ah, wonderful.

Xhafer:

about, there's a handful of woodworking notes in there and

Xhafer:

some measurements of this house before I bought it so that I

Xhafer:

could plan my kitchen and stuff.

Xhafer:

But,

Laura:

Well, I was gonna say we could auction it on eBay, but

Laura:

I guess I don't, we don't want people known about your kitchen

Xhafer:

I, like, I keep all my notebooks.

Xhafer:

I've got a, I've got a couple of them over there.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

Someday when this podcast is famous, we'll just auction that

Xhafer:

keeping my notebooks,

Laura:

Okay.

Xhafer:

there's not even personal notes in them, but there's like

Xhafer:

d and d campaign notes and stuff.

Xhafer:

I like, I don't segment my notebooks thereby time, so I

Xhafer:

just have them all that way.

Xhafer:

Whatever's going on in my life.

Laura:

Man, I, I like this one.

Laura:

I don't know if I'm ready to call it a four yet.

Laura:

Maybe we're making incremental improvements.

Laura:

Maybe this is a 3.5 for me.

Laura:

Yeah,

Xhafer:

I,

Laura:

what about

Xhafer:

I'm gonna put this at a four five.

Laura:

Oh, okay.

Laura:

It's a four five.

Xhafer:

loved this episode 4.5.

Xhafer:

This is the perfect tons of shit happens

Xhafer:

episode

Xhafer:

of this series.

Xhafer:

And the reason this clicks and all of the other ones don't.

Xhafer:

The other is all tons of shit happens through the lens of plot.

Xhafer:

This one is all tons of shit happens through character driven.

Xhafer:

Every single

Xhafer:

moment in this is a character driven moment of them dealing with the

Xhafer:

repercussions of their actions or choosing to act instead of things happening

Xhafer:

around them, which is usually what it feels like in this type of episode where

Xhafer:

it's just a ton of plot acceleration.

Laura:

Mm-hmm.

Xhafer:

Yep.

Xhafer:

Alon five.

Xhafer:

This is the shit.

Xhafer:

This is why I watched this show is episodes like this.

Laura:

Yeah.

Laura:

I, I'd really enjoy the stuff with Kar, especially, you know, the, the, the

Laura:

one thing that's motivated him to give up his sanctuary is to go look for Mr.

Laura:

Garabaldi.

Laura:

And that is so important.

Laura:

I also love the way we keep flushing out, Carta.

Xhafer:

Mm-hmm.

Laura:

He's just bonkers by the way you looked up.

Laura:

One of our thugs,

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Laura:

in uh, imdb, I decided to look up the actor for Cart Taja.

Laura:

You wanna know what he's been up to?

Xhafer:

Nothing.

Laura:

He is a lawyer,

Xhafer:

He's a lawyer.

Xhafer:

Good for him.

Laura:

yeah.

Laura:

He gave up acting and went, went and uh, became a lawyer.

Laura:

His stage name was Worthham Kremer.

Laura:

Apparently Worthham is not his name.

Laura:

It was his first wife's maiden name.

Xhafer:

Huh.

Laura:

So he was going by Worthham Kremer and now he is Robert

Laura:

Kremer and he is an attorney.

Xhafer:

Good for him.

Laura:

I love it.

Laura:

I really hope that he brought all that car Taja energy into the courtroom sometimes.

Laura:

Like,

Xhafer:

am super curious, but also hope I never find out.

Laura:

I mean, obviously.

Laura:

He's, he is almost in his seventies now, so I don't know.

Laura:

Could be really fun.

Laura:

Could be like chaos in the courtroom.

Laura:

But yeah, he's great.

Laura:

I mean, this, this uh, stuff that's moving forward is great.

Laura:

I can't wait to see what we get in the next episode

Xhafer:

Which is season four, episode three, the summoning

Laura:

Ooh,

Xhafer:

a mysterious spacecraft, heads towards Blon five as Ivanova

Xhafer:

and Marcus searched for more first ones to aid in the war.

Xhafer:

Blon five welcomes back.

Xhafer:

It's missing officers.

Xhafer:

The volans undertake a new fighting tactic.

Laura:

interesting missing.

Laura:

They're, they're welcoming back.

Laura:

The missing officers,

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Laura:

plural.

Xhafer:

Well, there's only two missing, so.

Laura:

yeah, I think we're gonna get some resolution on both those plots.

Laura:

That is what I'm

Laura:

saying.

Xhafer:

Well, I'm looking

Xhafer:

forward to that.

Xhafer:

But before we get there, gotta say thank you Jeremy Siegel for our lovely theme

Xhafer:

music and not accepting my friend request.

Xhafer:

We really love that you were able to put that together for us.

Xhafer:

We truly appreciate it.

Xhafer:

You can find more Jeremy's work at Jeremy Siegel 40 two.bandcamp.com, and also as

Xhafer:

nuclear jaguar on Spotify where Jeremy's competing in the album a month Challenge.

Xhafer:

And they're all great so far.

Laura:

Yeah, rocking it and thank you to Angry Deck Time Machine on

Laura:

Instagram for our podcast artwork.

Xhafer:

Thanks Aaron, for editing our podcast.

Xhafer:

We really appreciate all the time you put in to listen to us

Laura:

Oh my gosh, yes.

Xhafer:

And then thank you listener for listening to spending some time

Xhafer:

with us, listening to our show.

Xhafer:

We, we do appreciate that joining our Discord community, all of

Xhafer:

our friends there appreciate you.

Xhafer:

I know someone's gonna ask me about my two truths and a lie there.

Xhafer:

I may or may not say something.

Xhafer:

We'll see.

Laura:

I definitely was sitting there in my mind going, okay,

Laura:

which one could it possibly

Laura:

be?

Xhafer:

Yeah.

Xhafer:

Two of those are real stories.

Laura:

Yeah,

Xhafer:

They're stories

Laura:

I feel like we need to, to sit and discuss those at

Laura:

the next Star Trek, Las Vegas.

Xhafer:

That sounds like a plan.

Xhafer:

All right.

Xhafer:

Well thanks everyone.

Xhafer:

Have a good week and we'll see you next week.

Xhafer:

Internet.

Laura:

right.

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About the Podcast

Who Are You?
A Babylon 5 Watchcast
Join Laura and Xhafer, two internet strangers as they get to know each other while making jokes about one of their favorite TV shows from their childhood, Babylon 5.